Terrierists

I harbor two terrierists. Both dangerous, vicious, and on somebody's most wanted list. There's a price on their head (only when they make me really angry)...sometimes for a discount. The world (of rodents and pussy cats) will not be a safe place until they are captured.

FIRST on the list is the mastermind, Lilly. She is wanted for masterminding everything that the other terrierist gets in trouble for. You really can't blame her, though. She IS the smarter one. (He, on the other hand...well, like the saying goes, ignorance is bliss, and he lives a very blissful life.) She has set him up to get in trouble, then she hides under the bed laughing her ass off. I know because I hear her giggling.

"Did you just sass me?"

She was last seen next to me. She doesn't leave my side. It's like I birthed her out of my ass and the umbilical cord is still attached to both of us. (It's a long and stretchy umbilical cord, too.)

She told me that she wants to let her hair grow out so that next Halloween she can dress up as Chewbacca.

I told her that I would let her hair grow out, but I would style it in a messed up way and buy her a little Hawaiian shirt so that she could go as Nick Nolte's mug shot. She's still thinking about it.

SECOND on the most wanted list is Eli (alias Chino, aka Pinche Perro Cabron), highly sought out by the government's Homeland Security Agency (and by that I mean the dog pound because he likes to run away).

Police artist sketch of the perpetrator. 

This terrierist has no respect for authority. These mug shot photos from his first capture (yes, he has managed to escape again) are proof of his disdain for the law. He truly believes that he is above the law. Even though he is marked for death, he is hard to kill. Some say he is out for justice as he roams on deadly ground.

He managed to fool the authority figures into thinking that he would change his ways as he looked them straight in their eyes.

As soon as the authority figures looked away, his rebel, wild, disrespectful side showed its ugly face...and pink tongue.

He was last seen taking a nap. Don't be fooled, as soon as he finds an open door, he will make a prison break run for it. Unless it's a glass door, then he'll just run right into the glass thinking that there was no door at all. (Like I said, he lives a very blissful life.)

He is a werewolf at heart. No fear!!!

Please do not approach these dangerous terrierists if you see them. Actually, Lilly won't be out there because, more than likely, she will be next to me jumping umbilical cord. Chino, on the other hand, will be out there someday running wild. Do not approach him, unless he is crossing the street like he is a kamikaze squirrel and is surely going to get hit by a car. Then PLEASE catch him. Even cats wonder how he manages to have more lives than they do.

BLAHG you later!